


To Love Him Again

by orphan_account



Category: Smile For Me (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, Forgiveness, Healing, M/M, No Dialogue, Not Beta Read, Recovery, Therapy, i hope i didn’t miss any tags, kamal has The Gay, theyre really trying their best, well a little dialogue but not much
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-08
Updated: 2019-11-08
Packaged: 2021-01-25 11:10:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,220
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21355303
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: After the events of the Habitat, things are tense between them. They work their way through it, with long talks and tears and, eventually, things begin to soothe between them.That’s when Kamal starts to notice all of his old feelings come rushing back.
Relationships: Kamal Bora/Dr. Boris Habit
Comments: 2
Kudos: 27





	To Love Him Again

Six months. Half of a year.

That’s how long it had taken for Kamal to begin forgiving Boris for everything that had happened. The first three months were the hardest, because all of the sore emotions were still raw and open, hard to treat. Kamal cried a lot, Boris cried a lot. There were minor fights, and times where they didn’t speak to each other for weeks on end, giving themselves some well-needed space. The next three months were a little easier for both of them. After everything was out, every painful memory was acknowledged and apologized for, Kamal and Boris started spending a lot more time together, as somewhat friends. They’d go to dinner, walk around the city, laugh and smile with sincerity. They began to go back to the way things were before it all went downhill, though just a bit different because of what they had experienced. It wasn’t at all perfect, of course. They were both still so damaged from what had happened, still wounded, and that wouldn’t heal overnight, but it was better than it was by a long shot.

That’s when Kamal starts to notice all of his old feelings come rushing back. Not the feelings of anger, of almost-hatred, but feelings of light. Feelings of genuine happiness when he saw the tall man approach him, rather than the fear that used to soar through his bones. Feelings of comfort when long arms wrapped around his entire body in a gentle hug. Feelings of a silly, naive crush becoming more and more serious.

He didn’t tell Boris this. After all, they were both in no shape to be in a relationship, and they still had a lot of work to do, on themselves, on their bond. Boris started therapy with Kamal’s urgings, and was making amazing progress, tending to his little garden behind his house when his thoughts were troubling him instead of going off spiraling into a deep depression like before. Kamal continued therapy, as well. Talking to the man responsible helped, but it was nice to talk to someone who could give him some coping skills, some way of relieving his stress. At the time being, Kamal’s yearning to hold Boris’ hand, kiss his cheek, run his fingers through his mess of hair was off of the table entirely.

He didn’t mind it, though, because whether they were just friends or more, Boris was still Boris. He still laughed goofily, and called Kamal wacky nicknames, and called him in the middle of the night to tell him about a funny dream he had. It was nice and comfortable. It was headed in the right direction.

Sometimes, Kamal would come over to the ex-dentists house, chatting over some homemade coffee about finding a new job, what it was like sharing an apartment with Wallus, and other casual things. That’s what it was now; casual. Boris would listen, nod, giggle, and add a comment if he felt necessary from across the little wooden table. It felt a lot like when they would slack off at work when no patients were scheduled — Kamal couldn’t help the grin on his face at that particular memory. Before The Incident, before the PSA’s and any talk of the Big Event, Boris was the same man he sat opposite to now. He was happy about that, knowing Boris hadn’t lost himself in the period of insanity. He also thanked his lucky stars that the Flower Child hadn’t hurt the guy, only gave him a spark of hope. He wasn’t sure he’d be doing this well had Boris perished during the confrontation.

There were still bad days after the six month mark passed. Sometimes, Kamal couldn’t get out of bed. Sometimes, Boris would hurt himself. However, now that they had taken enough time to ease themselves back into this casual comfort, they weren’t in it alone. On Kamal’s days, Boris would send him pictures; cats, dogs, the occasional goat, his nourished flowers, along with a lot of emoticons and misspelled words of encouragement. It helped a little. On Boris’ days, Kamal would patch up his wounds and allow Boris to cry it out on his shoulder, shushing him with a hand rubbing circles on his back. It helped a little.

One by one, the other Habiticians began to reach out to them both. For Kamal, it was pretty instant, as he’d made quite a few friends while staying there, despite how he kept himself locked away on the roof. For Boris, it was more gradual. It took a lot for them to face the one who had nearly drugged them and stole their teeth. These meetings with the other Habiticians were heartwarming and heart wrenching for both of them. All in all, it was nice to see that they had all began to start their lives once more, trying to heal just like the ex-dentist and his former assistant.

The last to contact them both was the Flower Child.

Upon seeing the kid, Boris broke down. He sobbed, hard, on his knees with his hands tugging at his hair as he spluttered apologies. The Flower Child patted his back and waited him out, much like Kamal had done for the past months. Eventually, he was calm enough to get a single coherent sentence out:

“Thank you, Flower Hero.”

There wasn’t much to say after that. Boris hugged them, so gently, as they stepped into the night air, on their way back home to their awaiting family of florists. When Boris wasn’t looking, wiping his eyes from the tears prior, Kamal mouthed a gratitude as well, for entirely different reasons.

After that was done and over with, and reunions and amends were made with all twenty-two of the previous members, a weight lifted from both of their shoulders. This was good. This was moving forward. This meant that no guilt ran through their mind as they hoped for the best. Just like a milestone, it got calmer and quieter, putting their worries and regrets at rest.

It was now twelve months since it had all taken place, a full year.

Boris continued to flourish in his efforts of growth, as did Kamal. Boris’ garden was blooming with all sorts of well-kept flowers, and Kamal had found another position as a dental assistant for a company downtown. They were in a very good place for the time being. In favor of that, they got closer, and it made Kamal a little nervous. Boris, in every month prior, was still cautious around him. He kept a little bit of distance, so Kamal didn’t feel closed-in. Now, however, they sat shoulder-to-shoulder on Kamal and Wallus’ shared couch, not minding the worn fabric. An old movie played from the equally old television, and while Boris sat watching with a happy expression, Kamal tried to suppress his panic.

In these months, his feelings had only grown stronger as the man he once new came back full-force; maybe even a little better. They now saw Flower Child on a weekly basis, taking them to the park or to get ice cream. Boris would talk to the for hours on end about flowers, and the kid couldn’t be happier with that. Kamal had also became very close with Parsley, and was overjoyed at how the man had made such a positive change for himself — he and his parents worked on their issues, he took needed breaks from his job, (singular, thank goodness), and stopped eating things that weren’t edible. He’d even gotten back in touch with Martin and, much like he and Boris, were beginning to find solace in each other once more. Every time the man came around, Boris would package a little meal for him as he left, leaving him with a smile.

Compassion. Boris’ compassion was back. And it nearly wrecked Kamal every time he was given a coat in the chilly winter air, or a look of concern when he showed any signs of illness or injury.

It wrecked his heart, along with the feelings that were back and bigger than ever.

Kamal lost track of the movie entirely as he felt Boris’ body heat on his own. He tugged at the hem of his shirt to keep them occupied, as Boris’ hand was far too close to his own, and it would be so, so easy to reach out and—

He shouldn’t. It was too soon. They still needed time, they still had so many bruises. It wasn’t right to provoke Boris like this with his dumb crush, even if it was no longer just that. He took a deep breath as he watched the screen, not taking in any of the plot.

He jolted when Boris let out a loud yawn. Oh, right. It was getting late by now, and Boris was never one to stay up past his bedtime. Kamal thought for a moment, chewing at his bottom lip. Should he turn the movie off? Offer him a spare bedroom to sleep in if he was too tired to drive back home? Offer to share his own bed? _No, no, no—_

Kamal nearly tore a hole in his lip when Boris leaned against him, eyes closing with a content smile on his face. This couldn’t be happening. Kamal felt his heart begin to race in his chest, and he hoped Boris didn’t take notice. What could he do now? He couldn’t just get up and leave. What if Boris took that as a bad sign, what if it made him upset? They were doing so, so well. He didn’t want to risk messing it up, though he knew Boris wasn’t as quick to emotional outbursts as he used to be. He shook his head to rid the thoughts in them. It was the anxiety that had formulated during the Habitat, making him overthink. This was okay. It felt okay — nice, even, especially as their breathing began to sync. He trusted Boris, and Boris trusted him.

Even if his emotional anxiety began to ebb away, he supposed his physical anxiety was still present as Boris tapped his shoulder to get his attention.

“Are yuo oke-y?”

Boris’ voice was merely a whisper, as if there were others around them sleeping. That’s when he remembered that Wallus actually was in the other room, fast asleep. His eyes were large and shiny, holding a question that he hadn’t asked: _Is this okay?_

Kamal felt the butterflies again, the ones that had erupted in his stomach when he’d first met the doctor. They fluttered to his chest, making him shiver just a bit. Boris must’ve noticed this as he timidly hovered his arm over Kamal’s waist, ready to pull him in.

“Are yoo colde?”

No, not at all. He was warm, probably a little too much. His cheeks, neck and ears all felt as if they were on fire, and he hoped that the light coming from the movie didn’t give away the obvious blush. He felt sparks under his skin as he nodded, not breaking eye contact with Boris.

Boris smiled as his arm made contact with Kamal’s stomach, gently tugging him closer. Kamal yelped a bit when, instead of simply sitting at the doctors side in a cuddly position, he was shifted so that Boris could lay down, and was then laid down himself right on Boris’ chest. Their legs wrapped together as Boris gave his side a squeeze. Their eyes met once more, and another question was wordlessly asked between them: _Kamal, is this okay?_

It was more than okay. Kamal let out a nervous chuckle, which Boris matched. After Kamal hadn’t made any move to get up, Boris took that as an answer, (asKamal hoped he would, because words would definitely fail him right now), and placed his hand on the middle of Kamal’s back. Kamal, in turn, laid his head down on the man’s broad chest, feeling a wave of peace fall over him as he heard the soft heartbeat. Boris’ thumb traced circles on his back through his shirt and Kamal felt his relax underneath himself, eyes closing once more.

The movie continued to play, nearing the end, but Kamal still paid no mind. The thump of Boris’ heart had turned into a melody, and was slowly making the dental assistant realize just how much tension he had been holding — he was suddenly exhausted. He closed his eyes as well.

Sleep didn’t come immediately. Instead, he continued to listen, to feel. Boris’ breath evened out, signaling that he had fallen asleep already, but Kamal let his mind wander just a little more as his hands gripped Boris’ shirt, as he took in his smell of lavender and the outdoors, and felt the leftover heaviness in his heart fade away into nothing. This is what he had wanted when he met the doctor, this is what he had thought he’d never get once they fell apart. And, after a full year, this is what their relationship had come to. For once in his life, Kamal didn’t question it as sleep overtook him too, he simply relished in it — relished in the moment, in the warmth of the man below him.

The man he was proud of.

The man he trusted.

The man he fully forgave.

The man he loved once more.

**Author's Note:**

> THIS HURT TO WRITE BUT WAS ALSO REALLY CUTE...
> 
> I LOVE THEY


End file.
